The Lord Gave

The Lord gave.

He really did. He gave me that laughter. That late-night whisper. That smile. That soft place to land. That moment I didn’t know would be my last with them.

He gave it.

And it was beautiful.

And now it’s gone.

But it was mine once, even if only for a breath in eternity.

And yet, I mourn as if the gift never came, because I’ve stared too long at the empty space where it once stood.

I’ve memorized the silence.

I’ve traced the shape of the ache so many times that I forgot how full my hands once were.

I forgot how full my heart once was.

Why is it that loss blinds us to the goodness of what was?

Why does the taking away roar so loudly that it drowns out the gentle whisper of the giving?

I keep looking at the closed door with tears in my eyes, when maybe I should sit on the floor, place my hand on the frame, and say:

“Thank You for letting me walk through it at all.”

Even for a moment.

Even for the joy that passed too quickly.

Even for the love that didn’t last as long as I wanted.

Even for the laughter that now echoes like a ghost.

Even for the breath that didn’t become a lifetime.

Even for the hope that bloomed and then withered.

He gave.

Before He took.

And maybe that’s where the healing begins…

in learning to worship Him not just despite the taking, but because of the giving.

Because the pain I carry now is proof that something beautiful once lived here.

That I loved.

That I received.

That heaven kissed earth in my story, if only briefly.

That God, in His kindness, allowed me to taste joy…even knowing it would one day break my heart.

And isn’t that what it means to be human?

To touch eternity, while knowing it’ll slip through our fingers like vapor?

So today I will try.

To bless His name in the absence.

To worship Him through the weeping.

To fall to my knees, not only because I’ve lost,

but because I once had.

And that, too, is holy.

Even for a moment—He gave.

And that moment was a miracle.

For Avery, who went home to be with Jesus, 5 years ago today❤️‍🩹 The Lord gave and he took away…but my heart rejoices in the fact that he gave ❤️‍🩹